So, You Don't Work?

It's finally Friday and I am exhausted.  I feel as if I got nothing accomplished this week, even though I know it is not true.  As I look back at the life I used to lead, I don't know how I ever kept up with the pace.  I must have been crazy.  I realize now that working full time and having a family is not having it all.  It's having little pieces of everything and missing bits and pieces in between.

To make an already busy day more hectic, I had a doctor's appointment today.  As I filled out a new patient questionnaire, I came across a question that often irritates me.  The question itself may seem harmless, however it's the follow up by the office staff that is often annoying.  So what’s the the big, bad, question?  EMPLOYED__________Y______________N?  

My standard answer to the employment question is:  Stay at home, homeschooling mother.  Depending on the type of person who reviews the form I usually get one of two responses.  "So you don't work" or "Wow you must be busy!".  If I happen to get the response, "So you don't work", I will politely explain that I do work, I am a mom, wife, and a teacher.

In my late twenties and early thirties I believed that I could have a career, a family, and a home.  At one point, in that time, I was also working on my masters degree in Public Health.  I felt very strongly that I could do "it" all.  I vividly remember having a conversation with my boss, I said that “I would not waste my education staying home taking care of a family”.  My career was a driving force in my life.  Little did I know then that my career would soon mean nothing.

I was blessed to have a life altering event in 2006.  If it weren’t for a very serious horse back riding accident I would still be working today. The career that meant so much to me did not stand by me in my recovery.   My accident forced me to stop and examine my life.  I realized, with much regret,  that I had missed out on so much of my daughter's young life.  The only things that truly had value in my life were my family, my faith, and my friends.

Once the pace of my life slowed down I came to another realization.  There are only so many hours in the week for me to accomplish the things I need to do.  Being a mom, a wife, and a homemaker,  take up  most of my time.  To do it really well, and not spread myself incredibly thin, I can't imagine ever going back to my former life.  No title, prestige, or salary can make up for the moments lost with my family.

I want it ALL.  I want to give my family my all.   The only way I know how to do that now is as a stay at home mom and wife.  I no longer care about title or prestige.  No other career could be more satisfying, enjoyable, difficult, and exhausting.  I love my life.  I give thanks to God, everyday, for the blessings He has given me.