Two Loaves Of Bread

I heard the door of our antique bread box door slam against the kitchen counter.  Before I could get to Paige she was trying to beat the "you know what" out of 2 loaves of bread.  I was too late to save the bread but I was able to save the a glass of water.  This is what out life has become, moving from one outburst to the next.  We see less and less of our "Little Cupcake".  Hopefully soon, things will change.

If you look at Paige she is a seemingly normal 5 year old.  That is our blessing; it is also a draw back.  Paige may be 5 years old chronologically but she has the mentality of a much younger child.  Unfortunately, Paige's issues are not a question of immaturity.  If it only we that easy. 

Paige's brain does not have the ability to process many things:  abstract thought and concepts, she can not "read" people's body language or process sarcasm.  Much to my surprise, Paige has a learn disability.  More surprising, Paige may never be able to live independently later in life.  That is just the beginning of what Paige is facing.

Paige's fate was predetermined by the irresponsible and reckless behavior of her biological parents.  Their selfish want for alcohol, drugs, and their own person history with mental illness has effected the life of a little girl in ways they will never know.  We were robbed of knowing what could have been a happy and healthy child.

When we welcomed Paige into our home at 14 months we knew that she was special, that her needs were significant.  I never imagined that one day we would be in the position that we are now.  I did not imagine that we would have to seek specialized psychiatric treatment for a 5 year old.  I could not bear to think that the dreams for my little girl would not come true.  I did not think that everyday tasks like going to the grocery store would be so difficult.  We now have to rethink our dreams for Paige.

Despite the challenges that we are faced with everyday, I know that God has placed Paige with our family for a reason.  Paige has been a blessing to us since the day she came into our home.  With the resources that we now have through UNC, and the specialized services we will begin to utilize over the next several months I know things will get better.  There is nothing to big for God, His love and mercy are our constant source of strength.